Hello Clinton. My name is George. I have
taken over Joseph’s prison ministry. I’m not sure if you know this but he had a
stroke last year and has been unable to continue at his previous capacity. He
is doing OK now but he still has trouble with some tasks. It’s been a struggle for
me to get everything back up and running since I was handed this ministry
almost 6 months ago. There have been many technical issues and personal trials
but I’m pressing into the Lord for help and guidance.
I want to thank you for your heart felt
letter expressing the trials you are going though. Your letter spoke to me in a
very real way. I understand what it feels like to backslide and feel unworthy
of God’s grace. He still gives it anyway though. Even in my iniquity He was
always faithful to provide for me and He was always there to nudge me back on
the right track. Although He can make us whole at His slightest whim He wants
us to choose Him. God is not a tyrant. He is a loving Father who must chastise
us to teach us the Way. Even so His mercy and grace still are abound.
Sometimes we need to recognize that the best
we can do is good enough as long as we are truly focused on repentance and
purifying ourselves by the power of His Holy Spirit. He is faithful to finish
the work He has started.
“For I am confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will continue to perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6
Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the
Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, the
glory of the Lord beholding in a mirror, to the same image are being
transformed, from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord. 2
Corinthians 3:17-18
This is how I’ve experienced His love towards
His children. The big question is are you His child? Since this is our first
correspondence I should ask a few fundamental questions to get to know where
you are in your walk before getting too far ahead of myself. First, have you
admitted you are a sinner in need of redemption? It sounds like it from your letter,
but I must mention this critical first step towards being saved. Have you
recognized Christ Yahshua (Jesus) as your Savior and have you surrendered your
life to Him? Have you received the Holy Spirit and the love of the truth to be
saved? Have you remained steadfast in your commitment to Him, even in your
failures?
We all fail sometimes. Even king David failed
miserably, the man God proclaimed was “after My own heart.” He repented and
continued walking in faith. He was not flawless, but He recognized God’s judgment
on him for His transgressions and he rejoiced in it. Paul and Silas were put in
prison for preaching the Gospel, yet they sang praises to God. This is the
attitude Christians carry when we know God is our Father and we are His
children.
I want to believe I hear the Spirit within
you crying out for guidance however since it’s hard to tell in a letter I don’t
know for sure if you are following the Spirit of God or the spirit of the world.
It might not be my place to tell you that anyway. Both spirits can look very
similar “for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light” (2 Corinthians
11:14). We must be sure our convictions are from God. We do this through
diligent prayer and study as well as seeking guidance and confirmation from the
Spirit. I’ll be the first to admit that I too am just a man who is going
through similar trials of my own. God has led many of His people into the
wilderness to be tempted and tried by the devil. Some of us must be sifted like
wheat as Peter (Luke 22:31), Job and Joseph were. Keep in mind though what 1
John 2:27-28 says:
And as for you, the anointing you received
from Him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But just as
His true and genuine anointing teaches you about all things, so remain in Him
as you have been taught. And now, little children, remain in Him, so that when
He appears, we may be confident and unashamed before Him at His coming.
In regard to being “worthy of an answer” none
of us are but Yahweh is faithful to reconcile all of His creation back to His
Son (Colossians 1:19-23). We must learn to forgive ourselves as much as others.
Sometimes it feels like God turns his back on us. In my experience this is
usually because you have idols in your heart and He is giving you over to them
to learn your lesson. Our faith is tried and tested until we are made into pure
spiritual gold. God performs a great work in us but if we reject Him then we
place ourselves under condemnation. Sometimes He will even bring others against
us as judgment to chasten His unruly sons and daughters.
“And you have
forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons: ‘My son, do not make
light of the Lord’s discipline, or lose heart when He rebukes you. For the Lord
disciplines the one He loves, and He chastises everyone He receives as a son.
Endure suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is
not disciplined by his father?’” Hebrews 12:5-7
But if you suffer as a Christian, do not be
ashamed, but glorify God in His name (*or “character”). For it is time for
judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will
the outcome be for those who disobey the gospel of God? And, “If it is hard for
the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?” 1
Peter 4:16
The fact that you are troubled about your
behavior is a good sign to me. In my experience it is evidence of the indwelling
Spirit convicting me of sin. That’s a very good thing if you have indeed received the Spirit who is being
poured out on all flesh (as a fire consuming everything that is not of Him). Examine
if it is the Spirit leading you and if so remain steadfast in that conviction.
Feel the shame, identify the problem, renounce it by the power of Christ
Yahshua and cry out to Him in fervent, constant prayer until you overcome. If
the devil deceives us through repetition and constant temptation let us counter
that with even more constant devotion to prayer and study. You will find that
sanity and hope arise from the peace in your heart which comes from knowing you
are in God’s will, regardless of trials and circumstances.
Soon a violent windstorm came up, and the
waves were breaking over the boat, so that it was being swamped. But Jesus was
in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. So they woke Him and said, “Teacher, don’t
You care that we are perishing?” Then Jesus got up and rebuked the wind and the
sea. “Silence!” He commanded. “Be still!” And the wind died down, and it was
perfectly calm. “Why are you so afraid? He asked. “Do you still have no faith?”
Mark 4:37-40
This scene echoes Noah’s ark in many ways.
Noah means “rest” and we are encouraged by Paul in Hebrews 4:7-12 to enter His Sabbath
rest (the 7th “day” is the Lord’s, which is every day under the New
Covenant):
God again designated a certain day as
“Today,” when a long time later He spoke through David, as was already stated:
“Today, if you hear His voice, do not
harden your hearts.” Now if Joshua had given them rest, God would not have
spoken later about another day. So there remains a Sabbath rest for the people
of God. For whoever enters God’s rest also rests
from his own work, just as God did from His. Let us, therefore, make every
effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following the same
pattern of disobedience. For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than
any double-edged sword, it pierces even
to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It is able to judge the
thoughts and intentions of the heart.
This “ark” the holy priesthood carries is the
heart of God indwelling man, like the ark of the covenant. While the waters rage
(a symbol of many people in tumult) those who are in their hearts with God are
safe. We must trust in Him, even with our very lives. He is the holder of our
hearts and He will restore us into His promise at His appointed time. Let us
not be stirred up by the raging waters into carnal, prideful reactions that
lead to all manner of sin. If you really think about it, all sin boils down to
pride.
Read about Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel 4:32-34. Because
of pride He was removed from being king over Babylon and given the heart of a
beast. He was cursed to roam the wilderness for 7 years. I imagine he was
tormented that whole time. It wasn’t until he cried out to God and recognized
Him as sovereign ruler and creator of everything that he was restored to power
and given the heart of a man. So too, like prideful Nebuchadnezzar, we see
people taking in the spirit of Babylon more and more today as in the days of
Noah and Sodom and Gomorrah.
“Babylon has been a
golden cup in the hand of the LORD, intoxicating all the earth. The nations
have drunk of her wine; Therefore the nations are going mad.” Jeremiah 51:7
We as Christians have been given the power of
Christ to not fall in the fire or the water so-to-speak, but many do not know
Him enough to claim that power.
“When they came to
the crowd, a man came up to Jesus, falling on his knees before Him and saying, ‘Lord,
have mercy on my son, for he is a lunatic and is very ill; for he often falls
into the fire and often into the water. I brought him to Your disciples, and
they could not cure him.’ And Jesus answered and said, ‘You unbelieving and
perverted generation, how long shall I be with you? How long shall I put up
with you? Bring him here to Me.’ And Jesus rebuked him, and the demon came out
of him, and the boy was cured at once.” Matthew 17:14-18
See how Christ rebuked His disciples for not
truly claiming that power? This is the point of chastening – to bring us to
repentance so that we can be raised up as righteous sons and daughters of
inheritance. When we fail in faith it is painful to the Spirit within. If we
persist in our iniquity, going against the conviction of the Spirit we enter the
fires of hell already. Self-control is one of the fruits of the Spirit.
“But the fruit of
the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
Galatians 5:22-23
I hope this has helped you to gauge where you
are at in your walk of faith Clinton. I have and will continue to pray for you.
May you be blessed with peace and understanding!
Sincerely,
George
